Nose to Tail...and everything in between
Don't smell crotches, don't eat plants.
Don't steal food or underpants.
Don't eat my socks, don't grab my hair...
DON'T RIP THE STUFFING FROM THAT CHAIR !
Don't eat those peas, don't touch that bush,
Don't chew my shoes, what IS this mush ?!?
Eat your cookies, drink your drink,
Outta the toilet, outta the sink !
AWAY FROM THE LITTER BOX, IT'S FOR THE CAT !
(and must you kiss me after that ? )
Raising a puppy is not for the lazy,
Those rugrats are funny , but also quite crazy.
Don't despair through the toil and strife,
'Cause after three years you'll get back your life !
So let's go for walkies, so you can do your "thing,"
And maybe I'll get back my new diamond ring !
Poem for New Puppy Owners
You cower and hide
As I fill up the tub
Yet when I go outside
And turn on the hose
You follow me gladly
For a spray up the nose
When God had made the earth and sky
the flowers and the trees,
He then made all the animals
the fish, the birds and bees.
And when at last He'd finished
not one was quite the same.
He said, "I'll walk this world of mine
and give each one a name."
And so He traveled far and wide
and everywhere He went,
a little creature followed Him
until it's strength was spent.
When all were named upon the earth
and in the sky and sea,
the little creature said, "Dear Lord,
there's not one left for me."
Kindly the Father said to him,
"I've left you to the end.
I've turned my own name back to front
and called you dog, My friend."